TODAY I . . . (AN OVERLY CONFESSIONAL TYPE POST)

today i . . .

. . . sat inside a teepee with a two-year-old, a choo choo train, and a dinosaur, and made sound effects for twenty minutes. 

. . . bought two packs of hangers and finally organized our coat closet. 

. . . read on twitter that today was supposed to be the most depressing day of the year. to which i said, yyyyyyep. (although actually i looked it up, and it's really not until next monday. great.) (that formula halfway down the page though... yep.)

today i . . .

. . . pushed a stroller forty blocks, and ate 7/8ths of a chipotle burrito bowl. that last eighth, man! it escapes me every time!

today i . . .

. . . scheduled an appointment with an infertility therapist. infertility can suck the ever living soul out of you, you know. and then spit it back out on the sidewalk and dance on it. today i decided it was time to take care of myself. did you know there are entire specialists of therapist and psychiatrists who exclusively treat infertility-related emotional side effects? i saw a therapist briefly in idaho in 2009 because 2009 was a beast. it shouldn't be embarrassing to admit you could use someone to talk to. sometimes your friends and husbands can't relate, so you should find someone who can. i mean, it helps.

today i . . .

. . . appreciated the way our new over-dyed threadbare-looking black rug felt under my bare feet.  it was 40% off at west elm this weekend, sometimes a good impulse purchase is good for you, that's what i think.

today i . . .

. . . puttered around cleaning up and taking a few photos of the apartment. it's not quite there yet, but i do like how it's coming together. 

FUNNY LITTLE THINGS I FOUND IN STORAGE

△ this old picture from brandon's graduation when we were dating (why didn't i keep those sandals!?) △

△ honeymoon photos △

△ brandon! △

△  sometimes we write silly children's books together △

△ bridal shower! and brandon's wedding boutonniere all smooshed up △

△ photos from venice △

△ photos from paris △ 

△ photos from when i looked just like huck △

△ photos to prove my mother was quite the skilled hair crimper △

△ my mom and my uncle james and my mom's amazing hair △

△ my parents' engagement & wedding photos △

△ the original lovin trio // it is my dream to one day be as fabulous as my mother △

△ embarrassing family photos // blake and huck, separated at birth? △

△ prom! △

△ these people are silly △

NAT NESTS: SPECIAL PLATES ARE MY FAVORITE PLATES

i think i could eat bread and cheese for every meal and be pleased as punch. 

so, i spent a solid 12 hours with our storage in idaho two weeks ago, staring down my long lost collection of things that i love and treasure, all the while sort of sniffling like a ninny, and also occasionally taking breaks to stroke things longingly. i make no bones about it: pretty things make me happy. i attach a lot of significance to things. i promised myself i'd be ruthless with those storage boxes, and i was, but at the end of the day there were still a few boxes of vintage china i'd collected over the years that i have no room for but just could not part with, plus one extra special box of odds and ends that just made me happy when i looked at them.

to rationalize bringing that small box home with me i came to the conclusion that these things just need to be used. every day, all the time. not just displayed, and no more "saving for special occasions." today is a special occasion! even if it's just a wednesday night and it's only me eating cheerios for dinner.

a few months back i bought a brooklyn slate cheese board from murray's cheese shop in the village, and since then it's sat there in the cupboard doing absolutely nothing with itself. waiting for the right moment i suppose. but the other night at "dinner" (no kidding, pre-made trader joe's chicken + barley soup and a pre-made trader joe's bagged salad, i am such a chef), i realized i had some stilton blue and a black pepper chevré and enough salami to feed an army, so i decided to take my own advice and make a special occasion of it. 

and then two of our favorite people came over to join us, so it really was a special occasion! see how that happens?

and maybe i've been watching too much downton abbey this week (you can watch the whole season three RIGHT HERE right now!), but, what if we all just started eating on our wedding china all the time? just because "it's after six, and what am i, a farmer?" 

so there it is. toast on the pretty plates. i'm all over it.

WHILE YOU WERE OUT...

warning: this is basically a glorified instagram dump and i'm soooort of over instagram dumps, but it's like, i haven't blogged in so many years that i feel mentally blocked until we're all caught up. so... just, indulge me. whatever.

hi everybody! hi! hi hi! here's what you may have missed (pretend like you missed it) while we were off having christmas and travel and other things that generally aren't blogging.

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blurry photos of the weekend before christmas when we made the trek up to the bronx to see the train display at the bronx botanical gardens. it was un-real. we can't wait to go again next year.

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on christmas eve we attended a really fun dinner party thrown by some friends in the ward, set up huck's gifts under the tree once he was asleep, and generally stayed up wayyy too late like excited little kids.

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late on christmas day we flew into utah. and just look at my boys, will you? i like to pinch myself occasionally. i got to sit across the aisle from those handsome gentlemen and read an entire book cover to cover, uninterrupted. (i read gretchen rubin's happiness at home, which i was gifted at gretchen's release party way back in august and only now got around to reading. pats on the back, i am such a reader. and how much do i hate that word, "gifted?" thiiiiis much?)

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and then we were in the suburbs! cafe rio and target and fountain drinks galore and insane juice aisles. i had forgotten what it's like to shop in america. SO MUCH JUICE. henny finally got to try on his christmas jams, since he'd fallen asleep christmas eve in his party clothes. 

please to enjoy brandon's senior portrait. no, i know. bask in it.

it was real snowy. so we went sledding. brandon was so proud of that wipe out. "did you see that???" i almost never get to see brandon's daredevil side, and it's kind of a turn on... so long as he isn't holding my baby at the same time, that is.

it's important to stay hydrated in the desert.

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on possibly the coldest day of ever, the holbrooks took a road trip up to soda springs to finally "deal with our storage for once and for all" (more on this later). i found my antlers and i found our wedding album and we got arctic circle and peter pan's old halloween costume fits the huckleberry exactly perfectly so we'll call it a success.

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and then the holbrooks packed ourselves up and flew ourselves home. we'd missed the city, like we'd been gone a million years or something. and then i bought me a level-three winter coat like a grown up, 

so now we are all caught up!
holbrooks out