10.08.2010

Six And Two


I have had this post draft sitting in my Blogger queue. It says, "My Holbs likes to cook with soy sauce." And nothing else. I opened it yesterday and thought, where was I going with this one I wonder?

Lately The Holbs cannot use the restroom without Barnaby following him in. The two are simply inseparable. Sometimes Brandon will shout at me from the bathroom, "Is Barney waiting for me?" and if the answer is yes (the answer is always yes), he will crack open the door to let him in and Barney's ears will perk up with excitement.

It is so weird.

I spent a good chunk of my morning having my Huck examined. Doctors were concerned he was measuring small so the nurses sent me to the ultrasound wing for a quick peek. And then there he was, this big old baby in my not very big abdomen, and the Tech did her voodoo and decided he looked to be right about six pounds, two ounces. Not small. Just right.

"Well, you're free to have this baby whenever you'd like," is what she said. And then I got all sorts of crazy ideas!

The air outside was crisp as I waited for a taxi that felt right to me, and suddenly the Autumn air and my six pound fetus were conspiring together.

"It's only, like, fifty blocks--let's walk!" whispered the breeze through my hair.

"Maybe we shall go into labor!" shouted my irrational 37-week hormones.

"I weigh six pounds and two ounces!" my Huck reminded me.

So I texted my husband the plan:

I am going into labor today! Possibly. But probably not! Keep you posted! 

And then I saw an H&M across the street and decided not to go into labor until after I had checked it out.

It was a very good day to walk down Central Park South, because I got to stroke five velvety horse noses and experience one very deep and significant emotional connection with a chocolate brown lover of a horsey, who is probably called Lloyd (if these things are up to me).

I love to walk past the horses parked on Central Park South. There is something so sweet to me about a working animal, and the pride they must take in their work, and the stalwart way they carry themselves. But also it always makes me feel very sad, and I always want to pull an Elliot and free all the frogs in the science lab. Run wild, horsies! Maybe one day I'll work up the courage to tear through that place, setting them all free, never to haul a tourist through Central Park again.

I didn't go into labor, and I didn't free any horses, but I did have some salad bar at the Whole Foods, and I even made it home in time to walk my dogs past tall piles of garbage before the garbage trucks came by.

32 comments :

  1. When I went a week over with my second I tried all the tricks. None of them worked. NONE OF THEM.

    I did, however, have one baby at 36 weeks and 4 days (almost 37!) and one baby at 41 weeks and then some. Early babies are harder babies: they're sleepier, they're refluxier, they're a lot to deal with. Late babies are fatter and happier. Hang in there, baby bump, be an easier baby for Nat (who will after your birth, by all estimations, never go to the bathroom alone ever again.)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Haha! This post made me do two things...remember trying to go into labor because I was soooo ready...so I walked and shopped and walked and shopped... and it also made me really, really, really want to book my dream trip to the city to come see all those fun stores and just have the experience. Texas is a long way from NYC! :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. I have no suggestions to give you from personal experience since my children were born at 41 weeks and 41 weeks and 2 days. Nothing short of induction (and even that was a long process) was getting those kids out. However, I did have a friend tell me that she started using her breast pump and went into labor within 24 hours. Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  4. My first two were born at 42 and a half weeks (I kid you not!) and my third was born at 32 weeks (not to be recommended) when I was diagnosed with cancer, and had to have her so I could commence with chemo and all sorts of nasties. She was 4lb 10 0z and did well in the incubator and is now nearly 2 and a half and doing very well out of it too! As am I (fingers firmly crossed). Good luck with it all Nat - I'd keep him in there a bit longer if possible though, more time for H&M and pre-baby blogging!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm not a Momma so unfortunately I have no labor tricks for you, but, I have to say, I'm loving NY Natalie! I just got to take a lovely little walk through Manhattan today because of you. Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Kate, you sound like my mother, who keeps saying, "Aww, let him stay in there a little longer!" Of course he's welcome to stay as long as he'd like, as long as he remains under the 8 pound limit ;)

    ReplyDelete
  7. My parents swear by pepperoni pizza when one is looking to hurry things along in the labor department. My girlfriend says to move heavy furniture. Can't wait for the first photo glimpses of Huck!

    ReplyDelete
  8. your posts always make me laugh! i would not have been able to resist the H&M either, although i do find it very disappointing I haven't been there yet this year. I'm jealous that you get to enjoy fall in New York!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Of course there is the typical super spicy foods and walking and lots and lots of praying. I say do your walking in the H&M and maybe free a horse or too. The exercise and adrenaline will probably get those labor contractions going!

    P.S. You are a gifted writer. The end.

    ReplyDelete
  10. To Nat: Brava!
    My Gift: Visions

    ReplyDelete
  11. i didn't walk or do spicy foods... i did the other thing...and at 7 am the next morning at 38 weeks 6 days my water broke :)

    ReplyDelete
  12. Fry some eggs in a couple of tbs of castor oil. It worked for my friend, 2 times, and for her friend. So it's basically gospel truth.

    They sent K on a business trip (at this job that is not supposed to require travel. ha)... they sent him to none other than the SEL testing labs in Pullman WA. haha. Very funny.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I'm a firm believer that nothing will work, but a doctor once told me that foot massages have been known to induce labor. I don't believe her, but I'm going to con my husband into as many foot massages as I can anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  14. My sister in law swore mexican food made her go into labor (I am assuming the spiciness did it?). My own little guy refused to evacuate the premises. Even an all day induction did nothing. I think these small people just have a mind of their own and will come when good and ready.

    I do have to agree with the fat and happy baby comment. My son was 9 lbs. slept like a champ and was very happy!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Pineapple, walking and sex not necessarily at the same time. Acupuncture and acupressure have also worked for many friends. Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Did you know that six point two and six pounds two ounces are not the same number? Point two refers to two tenths, and there are sixteen ounces in a pound. So really, your baby is 6.125 oz, not 6.2. It's like, third grade math.

    ReplyDelete
  17. You need something positive after the math dork. Your writing is super addicting - This entire year is going to be full of all sorts of fun stories. Can't wait!

    ReplyDelete
  18. I am still holding out hope he comes on Sunday! haha. It's a GREAT day for a birthday! Plus I still stand behind the fact that 10.10.10 would be a totally gnarly birthday to have.

    ReplyDelete
  19. What IS it with the crappy anonymous comments? Loser.

    Anyhoo, with my first baby, my in-laws were visiting and we went out to eat at the tastiest Hungarian restaurant on the planet. Serious YUM. And then after dinner, my father-in-law jokingly drove over every speed bump in the parking lot, claiming it would induce labor (the vibrations, maybe?). Ha ha ha, Jeff, we all said. Yeah, right. I went to bed that night with nary a labor symptom and woke up at 2:30 am with full-on contractions. Baby Camryn arrived 12 hours and 5 minutes later (that's 12.08333333333 hours for the anonymous a-holes out there)!

    ReplyDelete
  20. how did i just find you today? So happy to have. good luck with that human being in your stomach, i haven't had one yet so it still seems totally weird and amazing to me.
    and you are hilarious. can't wait to be an avid follower.
    xo

    ReplyDelete
  21. well, my sister, on the advice of my grandmother, took castor oil on the due date of each of 5 boys. It worked on 4 out of 5. Worked all 3 times for my grandmother.

    only if you get desparate. it's gross.

    ReplyDelete
  22. I have heard that same thing about castor oil, so... hmmm!

    And my Gifts of the Spirit are empathy and intuition. Sometimes the empathy makes ppl mad. Which is silly, imo - how can you get mad at someone for being compassionate?

    anywhoo...happy birthing! and your giftie is currently traveling your way! oooooh. : )

    ReplyDelete
  23. Lori CritserOctober 09, 2010

    I can't wait for you to be a mommy. Good luck and their is nothing wrong with wishing him out. LOL

    ReplyDelete
  24. Both my babies were fat and happy. Over nine pounds and one was 5 days early! (The other right on time.) I am a firm believer of them coming out when they are ready. I never wanted to be induced and choose the day of their arrival! (haha, talk about stealing the show. ;))

    ReplyDelete
  25. Oh, I should explain that while being induced can be nessecary, I have many a friend that has been induced at 36-37 weeks because they begged thier doc to do it! :/

    ReplyDelete
  26. Boooo to the anonymous comment! I mean honestly...what a debbie downer.

    But I just wanted to let you know I have been following your blog for some time now and I absolutely cannot wait to hear about baby Huck, regardless of his exact weight! Your escapades in NYC always brighten up my day! I can't offer any advice in the way of inducing labor but I am inclined to agree with some spicy foods... I have heard that's a reliable option. Good luck !! :)

    ReplyDelete
  27. look who can comment now! your SISTER. thank ya lawd for gmail. this post is q-t and i like it. i want to live in that green bathroom till the day i die...preferably. let's make it happen.

    ReplyDelete
  28. I have heard back tickles can induce labor...you should definitely encourage the Holbs to participate in this activity.

    My gift of the spirit: being able to nap just about anywhere at anytime.

    ReplyDelete
  29. anonymous, did you know that commenting when you have nothing nice to say and keeping your mouth shut when you have nothing nice to say aren't the same thing? it's like, third grade manners.

    sarcasm is definitely my gift of the spirit.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Oh, you crack me up lady!

    I was two and a half weeks late. Come on Huck. Get outta there!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Castor Oil apparently is the only thing to work, but you've got to be pretty serious about wanting that baby out as it's supposed to be hideous & I was too chicken to try it myself.

    Nothing else worked for me, I was induced at 40 wks 4 days. Good job too; the baby was 9lbs - oooof! Glad I didn't go to 42 weeks. I was quite small as well, only gained 20lbs, so you never can tell from the outside. Small bump doesn't necessarily indicate a small baby.

    Good luck Natalie with the birth, everything will be fine and I hope you love motherhood. It's very rewarding and will leave you open-mouthed in wonder at what you have created :-)

    ReplyDelete
  32. Sorry, no personally tried labor-inducing tricks, but my mom swears by pizza.

    ReplyDelete

Comments are moderated because mama ain't no fool.